It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
