I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
