That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize