I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
