It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
