Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i just google imaged poop.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
i came on her dog
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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