did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Randomize
