people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
