hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
