how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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