i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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