How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
