Are we in a gay sports bar?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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