i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
