I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
