I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Come on in and take your pants off
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