in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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