I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize