Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
