is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
