I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
