My friends, they love my intelligence
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
