you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
