Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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