I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
