Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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