I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I got her a Nickelback box set.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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