My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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