i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
