Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
