You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
