dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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