and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
