She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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