Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
