Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize