I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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