okay pat passed out under dana's car
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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