2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
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