What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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