I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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