yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
