so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
