If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
