Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
