I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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