worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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