those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
