hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
