he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
