I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Randomize
